Perfect for the Sake of the Imperfect

What’s for dinner? Are the dishes done? When was this room last swept? Don’t forget to prepare lunch for the grounds men. Clean these shoes before you go to the market. Your cousin is in hospital, remember to visit her. Your sister complained about her marriage, have you talked to her? Your grades are poor and you are not Christian like anymore.

Cinderella was not just a tale in Naomi’s life, it was her life. She recalls as a little girl, she’d drag her kid sister from school. She had to clean her uniform and her sister’s, climb the kitchen stool to prepare porridge before showering and sitting down for homework. She never got to understand why she wasn’t her mother’s favorite like her sister was; but since she had internalized blame in her system, she survived. She knew whether a mistake was hers or someone else’s she still would bear the punishment.

As Naomi grew older, the responsibilities only piled up more. She now cleaned up after her two elder siblings who seemed to get away with everything. Her back took a certain hunch from all the cleaning, cooking and thinking, she had to do for a football team size family. The little brains she possessed would remind her constantly to spend as little as she could and save the rest for a rainy day. She didn’t know what she’d use the little pennies she saved for, but she knew it was wise to save.

The plastic container lined out with tissue, so it wouldn’t make coin noises, was filled up with tens and twenties but her spendthrift elder sister would ravish all of it before it even got to money worth spending. She liked to grab fries and went on a million tea dates but never cared to leave a little for tomorrow. Naomi’s heart sank deeper than her self esteem but whenever she tried to speak tears overwhelmed her speech.

Naomi was raised to be more of a man, to be there for everyone. She’d stay up to wait for her father and warm his food on days he arrived late. Just like she’d cover up for all her sisters’ whereabouts since she was the stay at home girl. It never occurred to anyone that she went to school but had no friends, she cared less though, pens and papers were all the friends she ever needed.

The quiet laid back personality began to fade off when Naomi started to experience life from a wider aspect. She had grown into a broken record that’d yap and was all over the place. She grew lazy when it came to chores and cared less what everyone thought or said. The ‘God’ she was raised to give utmost respect all diminished to just a religious being other Christians other than her owed their life to.

Whisky tasted better than cola and sex was an ordinary topic of discussion just like movies. Despite the freedom Naomi now swam in, she was still in bondage. Trips back home were devastating because at the end of it all, she was still the chores girl. The girl who never had a life because she lived it for others.

Naomi grew into a monster, her heart froze that it felt no pain and no fear. She saw the world from a perspective many would term as demonic. She believed now more than ever that life was just a onetime chance that should be exploited.

Naomi would save every penny she could with a vision this time round. Like other young ladies she’d dream of cars, houses, kids and whatever berries life had to offer, but deep down, her one ultimate goal was to move out to a place of her own. All she craved for was peace of mind.

In the life she lived and still lives, Naomi is a sister, a brother, a mother, a caretaker, a doctor, a counselor, a love expert, a perfect human and all she wants to be is an imperfect girl living a perfectly normal life. Some things don’t change, because her best friends are still pens and papers.